嘘つき？

I'm not fine lately.

I've been thinking about not lying to my students about it.

But somehow I think students might think my health is something trivial they don't want to know about.

I always end up saying I'm fine.

Last night I ended up sleeping for only 3/4 hours.

I don't know what to do with myself.

I hope I can be truly fine. I kinda hate saying I am even though I'm not.

I'm gonna try to sleep early now. Good night

ーメイコ

don't worry ok?

I don't know why, but I've been easy to vomit recently :( I don't want anyone to worry, but It's been happening a lot. Yesterday and today, I've been vomiting for a few. And a few weeks ago as well. I don't know. transparency's sake. I also tend to vomit when I'm happy more than when I'm upset. I'm a weird person. I don't know what to say for now. I'll leave it to this maybe. sorry for not being too informative for today and yesterday. I think I need to do some changes to myself.

Body clock?

If there is something I am super thankful right now for having a job, it's the fact I wake up early without any aid. I don't know it's really automatic. My body even if I sleep in slightly different hours, it automatically wakes me up at about 5 am and another at 6. If I sleep a bit earlier, I might always wake up with no need to extend at 5 am. I am kinda aiming to sleep a bit earlier. If that happens and I can wake up very early with no sleepiness whatsoever. I am planning to try and jog for reals. I hope like 9pm? I'm hoping. I mean everyday at 10pm I'm already kinda tearing already from sleepiness. I think what I need is also to be physically tired. Who knows? Maybe it may make me super healthy? I mean jogging in the morning then yoga at night? I hope that works. I'm not sure when I should properly have a bath tho? haha that might be a bit confusing? I'm thinking whether before working in the morning or after having yoga at night? It's making me undecided. haha. Well for now I conveyed a kind of thankful feeling towards everybody. I don't know right now all I have is teaching. It keeps me grounded. So thank you. :) Just a picture of me waking up a few days ago.

ーメイコ

Yey! :)

Today, I kinda am still sick but a different reason. I'm sick because I have stomach cramps today. So yeah. Here is what I was I got myself yesterday

Yey! I feel like I'm rewarding myself of some sort. haha. sorry if this is what I keep posting about for the last few days. But really! I feel happy and lucky to have met everyone for the last few days :) I met a lot of new people the last few days and I just really want to express my gratitude because you all gave me your time :) I hope I can share more and more to a lot of you! I also didn't see until now that I just got 4.9 stars! wow! Thank you very much! 😘 Also I might sleep already. I suddenly got a lot of work from my freelancing job. and everyone knows cramps and 2 jobs don't work too well right? So I hope everyone has a good night because it might be a real comfy night tonight! it's raining 😍 Good night 😉 ❤️

ーメイコ

目

As much as I hate admitting my fears, I have one I'm scared of that I'm currently unsure of what to do about. Mostly it's because it's something I really don't want and I still have to deal with it because it might be my reality, which is why I'm afraid of it. Ok so what am I talking about? the reality that I might have to wear glasses. I don't want it. すごく大嫌いですよ。やだ。I took care of my eyes so hard just so I never have to wear glasses again. I'm saying again because I did used to have glasses as a kid. but I kinda did bad things to it so I have to remove them. so my naughtiness actually paied off and corrected my astigmatism as a kid. I don't want to wear glasses for reals :( I don't want :( so here is what I look like now because Kate was basically scaring me yesterday that it's my eyes that might be the reason for my almost constant head aches. すごく欲しくない。I hope these lessen the headaches even if I feel stupid. whatever works.

ーメイコ